Friday, 23 August 2019

BE KIND🌺

Today, on my way to work as I was scrolling through WhatsApp statuses I bumped into this meme
( πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚I’ve ALWAYS wanted to use the “work" clichΓ© πŸ˜πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£)scratch that
I felt an urge to rant yaaaniπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚, y’all know how good I am at thatπŸ˜‹
BUUUT
Maybe I'm just bitter, or maybe I’m just tired of the judgement
Our society is so disgustingly judgmental, but why though
This statement is so clichΓ© because we are the society…you and I
I feel like everyone everywhere is preaching self worth and self love when deep down all we are crying for is validation and just a little consideration, just maybe. Can we just all go for therapy?πŸ˜£πŸ˜”
We live in an era where a woman’s wifely potential is measured by her endurance to bullshit and poverty and probably settling for less or dressing a certain way
I am an advocate of two sides of a coin and probably a consideration of the thickness of a coin
For the 24 years I’ve been alive, I’ve learnt to give people chances and be a little more considerate. And in this context, toxic second chances are out!
 What I mean is the next time you spot a girl dressed in an  overly tiny dressing, give her a chance. Don’t be throwing glances and making her look and feel all stupid for you don't know the demons she’s dealing with. Maybe she grew up in an environment where she was ALWAYS sidelined and felt not important. Maybe her subconscious just needs attention and that dress gives her exactly that and in that moment she feels most alive…and happy,at least
Maybe the lady who prefers richer people watched a loved one die right in their face just because they could not afford better medical care, maybe even just the transportation to the medical Care center itself. Or maybe her childhood was filled with nights of hunger and horrrible experiences that drive them to NEVER go back to that life again
Whether you prefer to cash on your hymen, or lead a two faced life or prefer the to dress in diras or like your men older or younger or prefer women to men and vice versa, you matter and so does the other person you are staring at and making them look and feel less just because…
Maybe the lady/guy who has sex with a new person every weekend is just crying for validation or looking for something
Maybe the lady who never puts on anything else other than her signature look has her reasons
The unsolicited advice we give to young mothers about parenting
Next time, before you pass on a judgemental statement, be considerate
Life is tough already and everyday is a learning day. Cut everyone some slack and mind your own, abi!πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ e no be difficult😁😁
Point is, everybody has their own silent battles that keep them awake late at night and give them bitter tears. Be careful not to be someone else’s reasons for tearing up
I'm not saying that other people's problems are more special than others
We all need just a little more consideration and a little less judgement
Whatever your reason is…be it psychological ,or just peer pressure, or just following trends, or just trying to fit in……the first step to developing a thick skin towards the societal judgement is knowing, understanding and being aware of our actions and being a work in progress to fix our demons and being better human beings
Just the other day, Thursday last week to be precise, the guest pastor at my church’s camp meeting talked to us about judging others. He put it in a very simple way..APPROACH
We are all wrong at one point but HOW we are corrected is al that counts
Someone could be having the best intentions but the APPROACH either destroys or makes the whole situation friendly or hostile
Just because you sin differently doesn't give you the right to judge someone else
There was this specific guy in our bible study group who seemed soo uncomfortable with the topic of money . I could fight him,honestly 😁😁😁😁. He made me feel like I’m in the wrong career.. I should have been a lawyer yohπŸ˜πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜….the way I articulated my facts😁..wuuueeeeh! I surprised myself
Before I turn this into a sermon, let me conclude by saying, in a world where you can be anything- be kind
It’s not even expensive btwπŸ˜‰
And the best part of it is that….it ALWAYS ALWAYS comes back to you. ALWAYS!

This is my world!

Call me Chica😎

Wednesday, 29 May 2019

I LOVE YOU❤️

"How long is it supposed to take someone to say "I love you"? I wonder

How many people have you told "I love you" and how many of them are still around😏.
How many have you told? Did you mean it?

These three magical words hold so much weight for most people and if told several times especially by the ones who left, then makes it loose its meaning to them

For me, saying "i love you"is like the beginning of the end. More of like Goodmorning to Goodnight. Anything could happen because often times the other person may not be on the same page as you are so they'd say it back just not to hurt your feelings… Or maybe they could have been waiting for you to say it first

People are very different. Some people constantly want to be reminded that they are loved… Some don't see the need of saying the words.. Others like to be shown…
whichever your love language is… We all just want to mean something special to someone (find time to research about your love language so your relationships can be abit easier to understand)

Same way different people can hear the same music differently
That's the mystery of music, love and life in general

Maybe you are afraid to say that you love them just because you have not said it to the right person yet, take a chance, Cmon
It's the Simplest word to say. But There's nothing simple about what remains unsaid after you do

By simply saying "I love you" the unsaid are:

❤️I know I will/may get hurt but am ready to be healed with you

❤️I want to try even when the fear of failure holds me back

❤️I do not know the future but I'm ready to be surprised along the way

❤️ It Means I want your love and I do give you mine

❤️ Nothing we do will ever be the same... Cs we will be doing it, you and i

Always remember that Just because it did not happen with them doesn't mean it will not happen with someone else

I think people who are truly in love don't really appreciate how rare what they have could be

But when it happens to you or is happening to you right now, ... I hope you celebrate it as much as you can and let the world know

Always remember to have good intentions in everything you do. In a world where you can be anything you want, stay kind❤️

This is my world.

Call me Chica! 😊

Thursday, 21 March 2019

A LETTER TO MY BABY’S FATHER




HI
This is the most sober communication from me in a while. Ha-ha...ikr!πŸ˜…
You are probably tired of my drunk texts and calls
When sober, I still cannot understand how you could just walk away. I have always had so much resentment and anger towards you but that’s in the past now. I cannot believe I’m saying that am over it…but I actually am!

You’ve gotten a million missed calls from me, especially late at night. That’s because I’m either drunk or at the hospital because baby had a fever or couldn’t breathe well
But, ooh well, I guess you’ll never know…and I cannot remember either. I wasn’t keeping tabs

I hope you are happy. Your current girlfriend is such a darling. She reached out politely and I respect her for that. You are such a lucky man.

 But I wonder, does your baby ever cross your mind? Does the thought even make you smile?

I hope this child never questions why you never wanted or desired to be part of this. You are missing out on a lot though

Thank you for this challenge. I grew up…I now work harder and am smarter and a better person so that we don’t have to be needy to you. If it were not for you, I wouldn’t be a mom and who knows, maybe I’d still be the crazy messed up campus girl you knew and never wanted to end up with as a wife. You did not have the confidence to tell me you didn’t love me anymore but you actions did. And I was stupid for thinking that I would instill love for me in you by having your baby.

Sometimes, I actually wish I never met YOU. On other days, you are dead to me.

I’m not even that mature

You still ain’t shit mahnπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Call me Chica!

This is my world

Monday, 4 March 2019

CAN A GUY AND A LADY BE JUST FRIENDS WTHOUT ANY BENEFITS/EXPECTATIONS?


Hi there? Welcome back!!
 It’s been a while. I missed you!

Quick question, how many fake/toxic friends have you cut off since the year began? Am I one of them?πŸ˜‚

(Adjusts imaginary spectacles)Honestly, FRIEND is the most misused word in this age

A friend is someone you love and who loves you, someone you respect and who respects you, someone whom you trust and who trusts you. A friend is honest and makes you want to be honest, too. A friend is loyal.

A friend is someone who not only doesn't care if you're ugly or boring, but doesn't even think about it; someone who tries to help you even when they don't know how. A friend is someone who tells you if you're being stupid, but doesn't make you feel stupid.

A friend is a partner, not a leader or a follower. one who finna roll up and be there.

Friendship is trust...It's a commitment which you have to invest in, and you have to give first before expecting to receive. Friendship is mutual.

True friendship is not when you go to school and hang around with someone just because you have no one else to chill with.

 It’s not calling someone up when you’re bored because they are fun to talk to.

It’s not when you have to talk to someone about something you don't particularly care about just to avoid an awkward silence.

They are someone who you don't have to talk to but someone you want to talk to.

Friendship is when your love for someone exceeds your need for them.

Friendships are not monogamous by necessity. Two people in a friendship don't need to exclude other people from their relationship. It's an odd form of love in which people develop a relationship without a relationship itself as a goal

Generally there is no man who wants to be just a friend to a lady.NO MAN!

Take a minute to evaluate your “friends”

Would the person you are claiming is your friend say you are their friend too?

For a guy to befriend a lady he MUST have been attracted to her or ever hit on her but got thrown into the friend zone or still hopes to have her maybe later, or he is getting benefits already. There are those men we have wanted, and somehow we both ended up moving on and we became friends with them.or some you use to get your assignments done or weed delivered-sis stop using them fellas...that is selfish!
Most of your friends of the opposite sex, Say either you liked them ama they liked you...but you realized it couldn't work so resorted to friendship ,Some are friends of friends or your partners friends ,Others classmates /workmates ,Some are our exes

A hot chic will rarely have real and true male friends, because all of them dream of having sex with her. But an average looking chic always has lots of male friends, said a Wiseman ahahaa! LOLπŸ‘€

Again it's easier for women. If the friendship proposal comes from the lady it’s possible but not at all from men .Somehow, women tend to have this notion that there is such a thing as friends without benefits, we are wired like that

Sometimes though, women friend zone men just to use that to build their self esteem
And the worst part of it is that the same lady will lead you on for a while before busting your bubble with the “we can be just friends” phrase
Some will even try hooking you up with their other available friend just to keep you around and not feel bad about it and convince themselves that they are being a good friend
You are then left with only two options…either continue flirting with her and pretend everything is okay, No diners night outs or sleepovers and road trips` or become THEE FRIEND

You will realize through life that you have soo many acquaintances… Very Very few friends

What good is friendship if you didn't like how the person was to begin with?
You wouldn't make friends with a person like that unless you had other plans for them in mind. People who made friends as kids usually get along well, it's why you consider certain people lifelong friends, and it's why you shouldn’t consider everybody your friend. And that’s why most of our lifelong friends are childhood buddies and people you met when younger. Wachana Na high school


Someone you work with in the same office or met at work is just a work buddy whom you know by association. You probably worked on several projects together or share a department or attended the same campus or shared the same or mutual friends or met in a club or party and they were nice or initiated a conversation or offered you space at their table

Someone you attended the same high school with is an acquintance.JUST someone you know!!

I am always surprised by the number of people who are quick to say am their friend like woooooooooohhooo chill browsky…we don’t know each other that well. We are acquaintances! JEEZ!!

What’s with the friendship craze?!!πŸ‘€

IF I ever stood up or rooted for you and was nice in a situation, it’s probably because I’m just a good person, and that has nothing to do with being friends

Some of these people we know from social media are also just social acquaintances. Just because I follow you back on instagram and comment on your pictures once in a while doesn’t make us friends.

Acquaintance is someone you know slightly but who is not a close friend yaani someone you know in a personal or social way

However, coworkers, course mates, hostel mates…generally any casual relationship between opposite sexes or same gender and any other relationship really, may thrive into friendships that may actually last a lifetime
But these are rare cases that thrive after standing the test of time. They do take a lot of time to be solid and make sense and most of the time it takes spending lot of time together or sharing common interests which in most cases may become risky and tempting unless both or one of the parties involved is in a committed relationship

Need I mention that platonic relationships need a lot of maturity, principles and morals to thrive?


What pride is there in claiming someone is your friend when it is not a mutual thing?

It’s a no wonder nowadays people are always ranting on social media about fake friends oooh snakes aaah this aaaah that .In real life, these people don’t give two shits about you and may mistake your feeling of entitlement to obsession

Its time we stopped claiming friends, BFFs and start investing in more realistic and beneficial relationships and people who will stay loyal and reciprocate our energies.

Be as picky with the people you call friends as you are with you selfies.
It’s peaceful, reasonable and you won’t waste your time ranting everywhere about fake people and snakes
Thank you to everyone I texted to ask their opinion on this and responded without hesitation. Y’all are the real OGs!

And as Wabosha says” thank you for passing by, have a lovely week and always remember to have good intentions in everything you do”

Don’t forget to subscribe and share

Call me Chica!
This is my world

Tuesday, 26 June 2018

JUST BECAUSE


       
People will always make you feel bad for breaking up with a cheat.
Its common to hear even parents advise their daughters “don’t end your relationship just because he cheated 

For men…cheating is a “just because” but for ladies the story is different
We are living in a generation of a very interesting species of men…men who feel the need to marry a decent nice girl to keep in the house, his house but still keep several others for reasons I don’t understand and have absolutely no energy to even try
Such are the men who have conformed to the societal belief that having a wife and children paints you as a responsible man.
They are the married ones who don’t even look married and you’ll often find them out in night clubs on drinking sprees with campus girls on Friday and Saturday nights and on Sunday afternoon they are doing brunches and Sunday fun days with le wife and baby
Paints them as mister mysterious guy, and girls like that.
These ones have been in the market, shopped for the top layer, probably did a church wedding an now still fishers, who’ve perfected the art of luring women.
You’d be surprised this type posts his wife’s photos on Facebook and any social media platform he is on all the time with deep captions that you’d feel the love and your lil heart melts and wishes.

We cannot single sidedly call the men out for this situation though, because even we as women let ourselves down
sometimes you meet this nice guy who on the first day tells you about his baby mama and wife too but we comfortably fall for them, because of what? You think he is responsible and you will be the exception, maybe? Or you think he is a generally honest one.

Sis, we need to Treat everyone we meet like they are the rule, not the exception
The disrespect in some statements is just sickening
Like a guy you just met asking you to have a baby with him. Yet, on the side he has different women with his babies.

That is like someone giving you a free ticket to depression. Or a free ticket to your own funeral, where you kill yourself yourself. ha-ha!, unbelievable! ? right? doesn't even make sense!

Unless you really want to, there’s absolutely no excuse for staying hurt “just because”
Be it just because y’all have a baby together, just because he paid for your college fee, just because people will talk, just because…whatever it is

What society forgets is that the same men are hawking another man’s woman
So, men should also be equally as worried about women cheating because trust me, we are waay better at it when we finally decide to. Ha-ha
It’s very hilarious cos when a lady finally decides to cheat or move on, the next guy is always an upgrade and you no longer even fit in her league, whatever that is. But men gon cheat with a betty( I know I used a lowercase B) from the block and leave you wondering what really happened.

What am saying is, if you still want to fight for your relationship, sit yo ass down and work it out, just don’t stay cs yo afraid all of them cheat and you’ll probably end up with one who cheats harder and more than him. LOL
It’s a stupid trap- Don’t even fall for it

I’m not going to talk about him cheating on you with another man, because that is something else we are going to talk about, next, maybe?

A week or two ago Samm Roi trended on Instagram for the gazillion confessions of boys and girls. Honestly, I was not even shocked when I saw some of them because that’s the harsh reality of this time we are living in.

We all deserve respect. Especially in our absence
So, Sis, if his ass is cheating and yo fed up, walk!
There are better men out here

The day everyone will prioritize themselves and be genuinely happy and contented, the world will be a better place to be in
Bottom line is, cheating is just unacceptable and disrespectful.
Why would you do that to someone you have no formal commitment to? Isn’t it easier to just end things with them and move on with the fresh new adventure you just met?

 ION:
Love your boyfriend with all your heart, but do not play wife to a man who has not asked your father for your hand in marriage. Playing wife isn’t a stage leading to marriage, dating is
On the flipside, stop demanding for husband favors from your boyfriend. He has no business proving he can make a good husband. He does not owe you anything

It isn’t your duty to make the man in your life feel like a man. it’s also not his duty to make you feel like a woman. If you don’t feel like it, that’s on you!









 In this world full of baby mamas and baby showers
I’m just looking for a bridal shower and my happily ever after
Call me JoJo

This is my world!